Hot Cocoa Hearts Read online

  Lying under the sled for protection, I shimmied on my stomach toward the tree. “I can probably live with a baseball game or two, as long as I’m not forced into any spirit wear.”

  “Hey, if you ever wore anything with the school mascot on it, I’d be disappointed.”

  I lifted up the edge of the sled for long enough to launch a snowball his way, hitting him square in the back. “Gotcha!” I shouted gleefully, then jumped up with the sled to run for the steep hill on the outskirts of Main Street Park. If I could beat him to the top, maybe I could sled down again before he fired his armful of snowballs at me. Breathless and laughing, I made it to the crest of the hill, jumped on the sled, and pushed off with my hands. The sled picked up speed as it whooshed downward, and I raised my fist in a victory pump as I got closer to Alex, who was still running uphill.

  “Not so fast, show-off!” He grinned wickedly, dropped every snowball but one, and made a dive for the sled. I shrieked as he sat down behind me and grabbed me around the waist, then crushed a snowball right on top of my hat.

  “Hey!” I yelled, squirming away. The right side of the sled tilted, throwing me off-balance.

  “Watch out!” Alex hollered. “We’re going to tip—”

  Suddenly, I was airborne, the wind whistling in my ears as the ground rushed toward me. I hit the snow and tumbled straight into Alex, who was sprawled a few feet away. I closed my eyes on impact, and then lay there laughing so hard that the only sound I could make was a panting wheeze.

  I opened my eyes to see Alex’s face inches from mine, his breath warm on my cheek, his eyes full of laughter. It felt like we were connected by some force pulling us together, but in a good way. Not like the nervous uncertainty I felt around Sawyer. There was a fresh, soapy scent to Alex’s skin, and starbursts of gold around his pupils, like drops of honey in pools of chocolate. How had I never noticed how cool his eyes were before?

  “Are you still alive?” Alex murmured.

  I shook off my confusion of emotions and focused on reality by giving him a playful smack on the back of his head. “I might be, if you would get off me.” I shoved him gently away so that I could sit up, then glared at him. “You fight dirty.”

  He grinned, shrugging. “Who ever said snowball fights had to be fair?”

  I was already packing a snowball behind my back, ready to launch a surprise attack, but the wind suddenly screamed across the hill with such force that I had to put out a hand to brace myself. Alex scooted closer to me to act as a windbreak, and for a minute, both of us tucked our faces into our jacket collars to ward off the stinging snow.

  “Where did that come from?” I said when the howling died down enough for my voice to be heard.

  Alex glanced up at the sky. “I don’t remember the clouds being so dark when we first got here. Do you?”

  I shook my head. Sure enough, the sky was a heavy gray, and the snow was whipping around us furiously, starting to blow into drifts at the base of the hill. “The storm was supposed to be ending by now.”

  “Looks like it’s getting worse.” Alex stood up and offered me a hand. “We should go. I’ll walk you home.”

  The clouds grew more ominous as we walked, and in the few minutes it took us to reach the other side of the park, the snow was falling so heavily I could only see a foot or two in front of me. As we ducked our heads into the bitter wind and pushed on, I was glad we were only a few blocks from my house. But gladder to have Alex beside me. It was getting harder to see, and when Alex reached out his hand to me, I took it, the steady pressure of his fingers in mine grounding me in the blinding snow.

  Finally, I saw glowing colors through the blanket of white, and relief rushed through me.

  “The Holly Jolly House!” I yelled over the wind. I’d never thought it could happen, but I was actually happy for the thousands of lights guiding us home. As we got to our front yard, I saw Dad struggling to right some reindeer that had fallen over in the wind and were already half-buried in snow.

  He waved us toward the house, yelling, “Everything’s blowing over! I’m trying to stake a few things down.”

  Alex offered to help, but Dad shook his head.

  “It’s getting too cold. You two go inside. I won’t stay out much longer.”

  We nodded, and climbed the front porch steps, bracing ourselves against the fierce wind. Mom met us at the door.

  “Thank goodness,” she said, hugging us both in relief. “I was about to send Dad out to get you.” She gestured to the TV, which was on the weather channel. “It’s a full-blown blizzard. Caught everyone by surprise.” She turned to Alex. “I called your grandfather, and he’s walking over. I tried to convince him to stay home, but he said it would be a good excuse to try out his new snowshoes.”

  Alex rolled his eyes. “That sounds like Abuelo.”

  I slid the scarf down from my mouth and grinned at Alex, who was covered head to toe in white. “You could pass for an abominable snowman.”

  “Look who’s talking, ice queen.”

  “Both of you need to get changed and warmed up before you catch a cold,” Mom said as a blast of wind shook the shutters on the front of the house. “Alex, I’ll bring you some of Mr. Mason’s clothes. They’ll be big, but at least they’re dry.”

  The door blew open, and Dad hobbled in, caked in snow and clutching his back.

  “Oh no, honey,” Mom said, rushing to offer him a shoulder to lean on. “Your back?”

  “Some of the lights blew down and I was trying to fix them,” he said through clenched teeth. “I must’ve twisted the wrong way …” He took another step and winced.

  Mom rolled her eyes at Alex and me as if to say, I told him so. “Come on,” she told Dad, holding him up. “Straight upstairs for you.”

  Dad made a sorry attempt at shaking his head. “I’ve got to get them up before the Holiday Stroll—”

  “The Holiday Stroll will have to survive with one less strand of lights,” Mom interrupted. She started for the stairs with her arm around Dad just as the lights inside flickered once, then went out.

  “Power’s out!” I cried. Everything was coated in stormy gray shadows—the lights both inside the house and out.

  “Wow,” Alex said. “We never got these in California.”

  “There’s a fire going in the family room,” Mom said as she and Dad took one painstaking step at a time. “If you’re careful, you can roast marshmallows in the fireplace. Em, light the candles on the mantel. I’ll check on you two in a bit. May as well get comfy. We’re in for quite a storm.”

  I bit into the gooey center of my s’more and smiled in satisfaction. “Mmmm. Perfect.”

  The wind was still howling, and snow pelted the windows of the family room. It was hard to see how much more snow had fallen since darkness was coming, but when Mom opened the door to let Señor Perez inside, there was at least another foot covering the porch steps. Mom had already decided Alex and his grandpa were staying the night, since the whiteout conditions made it too dangerous for them to walk home. Now there was muffled chatter from the kitchen, where Mom and Alex’s grandfather were busy cooking chicken with mole sauce for dinner.

  “A traditional Oaxacan meal,” Señor Perez had said as Mom had manually lit our gas stove.

  I’d never heard of mole sauce before, but the smells from the kitchen were enticing, and along with the glow from the candles and fireplace, they filled the house with a coziness that even the blackout couldn’t quench. Alex and I had been sitting in front of the fire, wrapped in blankets and talking for over an hour. After not seeing each other for a whole week, we both had a lot to say. It was so great filling him in on school, and telling him the latest kiddie sagas about the North Pole Wonderland.

  There was one topic I made a point of avoiding, though. Sawyer. Sawyer was part of the reason Alex and I had gotten into that fight in the first place, and we were having such a good time tonight, I didn’t want to ruin it.

  Now I glanced at Alex, who was blowin
g out his flaming marshmallow, and laughed.

  “You can make hot chocolate, but you sure can’t make s’mores,” I told him.

  I took the wire hanger we used as a skewer from his hand, tossed the charred remains of the marshmallow onto a paper plate, and took a fresh one out of the bag.

  “Watch and learn,” I teased as I held the marshmallow above the flames.

  “I thought you didn’t like my hot chocolate,” he said as I handed him a s’more with my perfectly toasted marshmallow inside.

  “I don’t,” I said. “But the masses sure seem to.”

  “And since when do you care what the masses think?”

  I grinned. “Hey, I didn’t say they were right.”

  He clutched his chest and fell back against the couch pillows. “Like a dagger to the heart.” I rolled my eyes, and he threw a pillow at me, which I ducked just in time. He smiled. “I haven’t given up on you. I’ll make you fall in love with my hot chocolate yet.”

  I didn’t know why, but hearing Alex say the words “fall in love” made my face feel warm. I tried to push that feeling away. “I wish you would quit trying to change me,” I told him instead.

  Suddenly, his face turned serious in the firelight. “I don’t want you to change. I want you to stop trying so hard not to. Sometimes I think you put up a fight just for the sake of proving a point.”

  I opened my mouth to argue, then stopped myself. It would be proving him right if I did. “Okay, bring it on,” I challenged. “What do you want me to do, right now? Something you think I’d normally hate. Name it, and I’ll do it.”

  Alex rubbed his hands together, plotting, then snapped his fingers. “I’ve got it.” He grabbed my tablet off the coffee table. “Watch It’s a Wonderful Life with me. Right here. Right now. Tonight. No excuses.”

  I buried my head in the couch cushion and groaned. “I knew it was going to involve Christmas.”

  I lifted my head, making sure Alex got a good look at my exaggerated frown as he scooted beside me and set the tablet on his knees.

  “Hey, you got yourself into this, remember?” He pressed the tablet to wake it up. “You will survive. I promise. You might even enjoy it.”

  I wanted to grit my teeth, to tell him there wasn’t a chance he’d be right. But once the movie began, and the first half hour had passed, I forgot every argument I had against the movie. Dialogue I’d been so quick to roll my eyes at in the past, for some reason tonight, struck me as sweet. It might’ve been because, as I watched, I imagined Grandma sitting beside me on the couch telling me she’d give me the moon if I wanted it, just like George had told Mary in the movie. I could see my dad beside her, grinning like he was thirty years younger than he actually was, without a worry in the world. How many times had we all watched this movie together when I was little? At least a dozen.

  Or, it might’ve been because of Alex. Watching the movie with him was like watching it for the first time, seeing everything with his fresh enthusiasm. Everything about his laugh and smile as he watched was genuine, and weird as it was, knowing that he loved the movie as much as he did made me want to like it just so that I could share it with him.

  Soon, I was making comments about mean Mr. Potter right alongside Alex, giggling at Clarence’s angelic innocence, and rooting for George to return to his old life again. There was one fleeting moment when I felt a pang of nerves, imagining what Sawyer would say about me watching this movie, but I quickly brushed it off. Sawyer might not understand, but then again, we didn’t have to agree on everything, did we?

  I snuggled into the blanket, feeling the kind of satisfying physical tiredness that comes after spending time outdoors in the snow. A peaceful sleepiness swept over me, and before I knew it, I was struggling to keep my eyes open. Just as I was drifting off, a thought struck me. It didn’t matter how much Alex and I disagreed on, or how different we were. I didn’t ever want to risk losing him again.

  “Dinner!”

  Mom’s voice was distant, muted, and I was wrapped in such a pleasant cocoon of warmth that I didn’t want to move. I yawned and shifted slightly, and when I did, my heart jumped to my throat. My head wasn’t on a pillow. It was … on Alex’s shoulder. His head was nestled into mine, his eyes closed in sleep.

  Blushing like mad, I eased away, but when I did, Alex’s head slumped back against the couch, and his eyes opened. I hoped I’d moved away before he could realize that we’d fallen asleep head to head like a—what? Couple, my brain said in turmoil.

  “Hey,” he said, smiling. “Some life of the party I am, huh? Sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

  “No, it’s fine,” I blurted. Good. He didn’t know.

  He nodded, yawning. “So, I meant to ask you before, but then we got caught up in sledding and everything. What was your last Secret Santa gift? Did you like it?”

  I swallowed thickly, feeling a stirring of dread. This was it, the perfect time to tell him everything that had happened with Sawyer. The topic I’d been avoiding all day.

  I took a deep breath. “The gift was amazing,” I started. “A new camera. Well, not new, but new enough …”

  “And you’re happy with it?” he asked, his eyes intent on my face.

  “Are you kidding?” I laughed in my nervousness. “It’s incredible! I mean, I haven’t had a chance to work with it yet, but it’s the camera I wanted. Definitely.”

  “That’s great.”

  I nodded, ducking my head to stare into the roaring fire. My hands clenched and unclenched in my lap, but I gave my best attempt at an excited smile. “There’s something else, too,” I tried to gush. “Sawyer asked me to the movies! Tomorrow night. Or, we’re supposed to go out tomorrow night if the storm’s over—” My words died away awkwardly, and I felt a surge of irritation with myself. Why had the happiness in my voice sounded so fake?

  “That’s big news,” Alex said slowly, but his voice was weighted down with disappointment. “I know how much you want this.”

  “Oh, I do!” I said as confidently as I could, even though that was far from what I felt.

  Alex looked thoughtful, then frowned. “Well, we won’t see much of each other anymore, I guess.”

  I snorted in disbelief. “Of course we will.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “No. Once Christmas is over and the North Pole Wonderland closes, you won’t be working at the mall anymore. And we never hang out at school.” He shrugged. “Things will change.”

  “I won’t let them,” I said, fighting down an inkling of unease. This week had felt so disjointed without Alex, and now I wasn’t able to fathom a day when we wouldn’t talk or see each other. I opened my mouth to tell him he was wrong, but at that moment, Mom stuck her head into the family room.

  “Oh, good, you’re up!” she declared. “You guys looked adorable snoozing on the couch! I hated to wake you, but, Alex, your grandfather has made the most magnificent meal.”

  “You were sleeping, too?” Alex shot me a questioning glance.

  “Um, not really,” I mumbled, my cheeks on fire. I leapt up to follow Mom into the kitchen, desperately seeking a subject change. “How’s Dad?”

  Mom shook her head. “Terrible. I swear, he’s more worried about those decorations than his back, stubborn man.” She sighed. “If he could move, he’d be out in the yard right now on a rescue mission. With as much wind and snow as we’re getting, I can’t believe we’ll still have the town’s Holiday Stroll tomorrow. But if there is a stroll, I’m afraid there won’t be any Holly Jolly House left to see.”

  “Oh no,” I said, and Mom glanced at me in surprise.

  “I thought you’d be saying good riddance.” Her words were meant teasingly, but it hurt when she said them. “Are you having a change of heart?”

  “I—I …” I wavered uncertainly. “I feel bad for Dad, that’s all.”

  “Well, we’ll see how things look in the morning.” She squeezed my hand. “Now let’s eat before it gets cold.”

  We sat down to
the meal, which was delicious, just like Mom had said. But while Mom and Señor Perez seemed to have a never-ending stream of topics to chat about, Alex and I were completely tongue-tied. Short of a few clipped exchanges passing food and asking for seconds, neither one of us said much. Alex didn’t offer any advice, like he usually did, or even crack any jokes about me being Grinchified. He ate quietly, and once we’d cleaned up the dinner dishes and Mom pulled out Scrabble, he stood to go to bed.

  “Wait a sec!” I protested. “You’re on my team. Your abuelo and my mom will cream me without you!”

  He only shrugged. “I’m wiped after all that sledding.” He waved with his flashlight as he headed upstairs to the guest bedroom he was sharing with Señor Perez. “See you in the morning.”

  My heart drooped as his footsteps sounded on the stairs, and even though Mom wanted to go ahead with the game, I excused myself a few minutes later, faking a yawn. “I’m going to head up, too.”

  Once I was tucked into bed under layers of blankets, all I could do was toss and turn. Usually my window was filled with the dancing, color-changing Christmas lights, but tonight the only view through the glass was darkness.

  I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to summon excitement over my upcoming movie night with Sawyer. Still, all I could think about was my talk with Alex, and how strangely he’d behaved afterward. “Things will change,” he’d said. Somehow, tonight, I felt like they’d already started to.

  I woke up Saturday morning to a blinding brightness, and when I glanced at the window, I couldn’t see the street because of the layer of ice and snow that had frozen to the glass overnight. I tried the light switch in my room. Nothing. The power was still out. After getting dressed, I hurried out of my room, my dread building with every step. Passing the open door to my parents’ room, I peeked in. Dad was lying flat on his back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. His face told me everything I needed to know.

  “Dad?” I whispered.

  He sighed. “The Holly Jolly House is gone. Your mom took a look a few minutes ago. The storm blew most of it away.”